Saturday 15 June 2013

15 June 2013.............. A repressed son!

When we are about to born , we have only a world of two persons, they nourished you they help you in every aspects. So the my story is, only son of my parents. Most of families in India belongs to a middle class and so my family. We are told to watch our desires since our childhood. Being a human I also had some desires when I was a small child ,when little grown up little more but always have. From my very small age I was a pliable boy, a boy who never share his feelings with his parents, a boy who always suppress his desires, a boy who always hesitate to ask anything from there parents. Many of times I just put my desires in dustbin and move on. I was appreciated from many as a child who is not a headstrong but the cost I pay remains confined to me nobody can understand it, and when I feel bad they ask "what happen is something wrong with your health " and I was remain silent I had no words to say just "I am alright" because it was not about desire it was of health which is good and they gone relaxed and have a perception "he is just like that, a silent melancholic person". Which indeed A person wants to fly, who wants to cope up with his friends, who wants to enjoy. But all those chapter are rarely told. Now I am grown up allowed to take the decisions of life, but still I suppressed my want, hesitate asking something which are my need and necessity. But being positive I made myself a person who always happy in any conditions, still there is twinge in my heart on which I can't able to succeed till now.........or may be never.

Tuesday 11 June 2013

11 Jun 2013......A Rainy day


I am enjoying the weather which gives me sensation, sensation of emotions & feelings. I am in flashback,My childhood. I remember how I was grown up, cold breeze reminds me all good things , joy & happiness with  black clouds that pushing me in the darkness of my life. Darkness which comprises of pain, sorrows and low feelings.But the cool breeze dominating the dark clouds. Green dancing leaves enjoying the romantic weather and I with the mixed feelings. I see birds flying opening their wings like they are accepting what the nature, the God has given to them. I remember how I enjoy this weather in past, playing cricket with my friends, sharing laughter with each other but today I am silent sitting at the corner of my terrace, Listening Bengali Folk Flute music By John Wubbenhorst. Classical instrumental music is all time favourite of mine. I can hear some music which is hard to listen i.e. Music of Nature which soothe me, my mind and my heart. I see little ants collecting food for monsoon season (one of the workaholic creature or may be only one). I see everybody is giving thanks to God and I just saying the few words 

     
                                        HA RAHAM HA RAHAM FARMA E KHUDHA...